Sunday, February 21, 2010

What are you thinking about?


Friday, February 19, 2010

The presidential trash


Not pictured:  Joe Bidens Camaro and the old sofa on the porch.

Completely unrelated:   Mark Steyn is a very bad man.

Also unrelated:  Would it be Senator Mellencamp, Senator Cougar, or Senator Cougar-Mellencamp?


Barrack Obama, Feb 2, 2010:  "You don't blow a bunch of cash in Vegas when you're trying to save for college."

Barrack Obama, Feb 19, 2010:  President Barack Obama is unveiling $1.5 billion in housing help, a boost timed to his appearance in the city with the worst foreclosure crisis in the nation.

You don't blow a bunch of cash in Vegas when you're trying to fix the economy.

This is scary

If the radical tea party wing is willing to try something like this on an army base, what is to stop them from poisoning the entire country?

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Hot news babe alert

I`d hit it.

Monday, February 15, 2010

My impeccable progressive credentials are going to take a hit on this one

I keep getting invitations on facebook to join up for some 1 million people in support of gay marriage thing. 

I'm getting tired of saying no.

I simply don't see the sense in redefining a thousand-year old institution for hundreds of millions of Americans to appease a fringe group.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

I'm somewhat dismayed by the tenacity with which conservatives cling to their economic theories

Case in point.

From the comments, it is clear that "admin" fails to appreciate the theoretical merits of the compulsory employment model (as formulated by Speng Musselman and myself), preferring instead to stand by a quote from conservative shill Mark Steyn:
No, the idea that you, to qualify for a $6,000 dollar tax credit, you pay someone or you hire someone and take them on at $105,000 dollars. That’s what I mean about a know-nothing administration. It doesn’t understand why people hire people. You hire people because you are growing your business, you’ve got more sales, and you need to make more product. That’s why you hire people. You don’t hire someone to give them $105,000 dollars to access a $6,000 dollar tax credit. This is stupid.
Which begs the question:  If he is so learned in the ways of economics, why is he shilling himself out to AM radio and conservative rags?  But I digress.

On an obliquely related note, another discussion arose here, wherein the proprietor wrote glowingly of a recent Matthew Yglesias post exploring both the simplicity and effectiveness of another stimulus bill, as clearly illustrated below:

Which brings us to a natural extension of the Compulsory Employment Model as a means to promote jobs growth and heal our economy.   I submit that in the words of my colleague Speng Musselman:
  • "There is no proven correlation between sales growth and small-business hiring practices."  Only the presence of robust regulation can cultivate an economic environment condusive to jobs growth.
  • Government should step in and mandate that businesses with net profits above an arbitrary threshhold be required to hire additional workers.
And here's the kicker:
  • Government should then tax business based upon the additional workers they hire under the proposed mandate and use the additional revenue generated to fund more stimulus.

It is brilliant in it's simplicity.

(UPDATE:  2/15/2010)  "theLibertyPen" disagreed with me:
To be blunt, you (TP) and your friend (SM) display a remarkably stunted understanding of economic practicality – which is typical of those enamored with Keynesian models and their extreme variants (i.e. intromissive Marxism). Which in themselves are superiorly theoretical, non-quantitative models that neglect empiricism and other measures of viability.

Short hand version of the above rebuttal:  "No, you!"

Simply saying something is wrong is not enough to make it wrong.  Its not like in the Iraq War (which was wrong) which goes without saying.

In that same comments, someone actualy said that the compulsory employment model worked and led to smaller unemployment.
"Also, I have to point out that TP’s “idea” was implemented in a similar form in the former Soviet Union which constantly boasted of its extremely small unemployment rate."
So this proves our model is sound.

Video somewhat related to The Erotic Adventures of Randy Rasmussen post below

This is clearly not Kevin LaFontaine's car (no oversize rear spoiler), but its a reasonable facsimile.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

The Erotic Adventures of Randy Rasmussen

(Scene 1: Pan from dark, overcast sky downward to reveal a desolate, snowbound stretch of highway. A white sign, half covered in ice reads US 50. Below that, another reads Ely 105 miles. From behind and to the right, brilliant white lights suddenly pierce the darkness, illuminating snow drifts blowing across the blacktop. A custom Peterbilt 18 wheeler growls past. Inside the cab, a toasty sanctuary from the bone-rattling cold, intrepid long haul trucker Randy "Dave" Rasmussen struggles to stay awake as pushes onward through the night toward Salt Lake City.)

RANDY: Gotta stay awake, "Dave". Only five hours to go.

(Randy stiffles a yawn and shakes his head as his radio crackles to life)

"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  Breaker breaker one niner any other road doggs howlin' tonight?  Come back.

RANDY:  I gotcha "Big Dick".  Whaddya hear?
"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  "Dandy Dave".  Is thatchoo? 
RANDY:  Thats a ten four, good buddy.
"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  Say-a "Dave", dispatch is hollerin' at me to pull off the road.  Says Austin summit is closed.   Says it wont open 'til tomorrow afternoon.   Is that gospel?  Over.
RANDY:  That's right, "Big Dick", the county mounties shut it down right behind me.  It's a dicey go twenty miles on either side too.
(Cut to scene 2:  A primer gray Dodge Neon, with an over-sized rear spoiler and mismatched custom wheels rests on the highway shoulder.  A solitary figure sits shivering behind the wheel.  Inside the poorly modified Mopar tomb, Kevin LaFontaine has begun to second guess his decision to not stop for gas in Ely.)
KEVIN LAFONTAINE:  Herrrrrrrrrrrrr Derrrrrrrrrr.
(Kevin sticks his index finger into his nose. He pulls it out and carefully examines a gummy wad of mucus showing a faint tinge of blood.)
KEVIN LAFONTAINE:  Derrrrrrrrrrr.
(Cut to scene 3:  Sheltering from the blizzard in her own custom Kenworth,  "Sweaty" Alice Negretti, listens idly to radio traffic while half-heartedly watching an episode from season 3 of her Melrose Place DVD collection.  She flexes her keigel muscles continuously, conscious of an ache deep inside and knowing only the solid thrust of a mans flesh cudgel could ease her emotional and sexual pain.)
"SWEATY" NEGRETTI:  (staring at her radio but speaking to herself)  I'm here, you sonsabitches.  Take me.  I'm here for the taking.
(The radio crackles)
"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  I'ma pull it over, east side of Eureka.  You up for some comp'ny  "Dave"?
RANDY:  Love to "Big Dick",  but I have to see this load through to Salt Lake before 10 am.

"SWEATY" NEGRETTI:  (to herself)  I'm right here, you sonsabitches.  I'll do ya both for a wink'n a smile.

(Cut to scene 4 - Subtitle: 45 minutes later...  Two custom Peterbilt rigs parked alongside the other.  One pointed eastbound idling languidly, the other pointed westbound, rocking violently side to side.  Muffled voices can be heard over the howling blizzard.)

RANDY:   (muffled)  Oh yeahhhh, brother.  Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh.  Ride me like a rodeo champ.

"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:   Unnnnngh

RANDY:   Thats it, you big pecker!

"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  Aaaagghhhhhh 
(Cut to scene 5:  Inside "Sweaty" Negretti's rig.  Melrose Place credits scroll slowly up her video screen.)

"SWEATY" NEGRETTI:  Sonsabitches.

(she reaches for a medium size roll-on deodorant container)

"SWEATY"  NEGRETTI:  I can do this myself.

(she pulls the bottom of a silk teddy up toward her chin, revealing an exquitely trimmed minge, with a tiny "faux hitler moustache" patch of velvety pubic hair  just below her panty line)

"SWEATY" NEGRETTI:  Sonsabitches.

(Cut to scene 6:  Kevin LaFontaine, exhausted, frostbitten, and resigned to his fate remains slumped behind his steering wheel.  Frozen rivulets of snot plastered to his upper lip.)

KEVIN LAFONTAINE:  Hurrrrrrr Durrrrrrrrrrrr

(he farts, shudders, and surrenders to the cold)

(Cut to scene 7:  Inside the toasty confines of a custom Peterbilt, two nude men lie spooning in the sleeper cab.  The wiry hair on "Big" Dick Augney's stomach clinging like velcro to the thick, coarse hair matted generously over Randy "Dave" Rasmussen's ass.  The smells of armpit sweat, feces, anal lube and semen compete for supremacy in the confines of their love nest.)

RANDY:  I'm stretched wider than a bell-bottom pant leg.  Yeah.  Thats the stuff.   Thank you, "Big" Dick.

"BIG" DICK AUGNEY:  Any time pard'ner.  It was my pleasure...

RANDY:  (interrupts)  But I really gotta be on my way.  I have to see my load through to Salt Lake before 10am.

(Outside, a hot pink Kenworth blasts by. From its now slightly cracked windows wafts the faint, pleasant aromas of vanilla and tuna fish)

"SWEATY" NEGRETTI:  (sighs)  Sonsabitches.

(Cut to scene 8:  A custom Peterbilt roars past a stalled Dodge Neon, whose windows are now covered in frost.  The truck driver, Randy "Dave" Rasmussen, does a double take as he thinks in passing that he can make out the silhouette of a person slumped over the steering wheel.)

RANDY:  Sorry pal.  Can't stop now.  Those school children in Salt Lake need this load of pencils and I plan to see them through!

(The custom Peterbilt rumbles on through the night.)

To be continued...

(UPDATE  7:30pm:  title changed)

Information Requested

Does anyone know of a website that offers or facilitates opportunities for guys to meet and date military wives whose husbands are away on deployment? 

Friday, February 12, 2010

Would you rather watch the opening ceremonies for the Vancouver Olympics or be hospitalized in a coma for a month?

Personally, I'd take the coma for a month because I know that the coma would eventually end.  The opening ceremonies NEVER end.

Incidentally, why are winter Olympic games never held in the southern hemisphere?   The fact that they are only held in the northern hemisphere is inherently racist.

Iran was supposed to deliver a telling blow yesterday

Did anyone catch what it was?

I waited all day for it, but as the day wore on I found myself becoming impatient.  I tried to temper my expectations for their promised telling blow.  I considered the possibility that they weren't talking about a "telling blow", but rather a "kilo of blow" and that somehow that promise was skewed in the interpretation. 

Then I played WoW for a while and went to bed.

Jim Treacher posts upskirt shots

Probably trying to boost traffic.

Incidentally, I still think he's a boob.   Kind of like Kenny Mayne, except not as funny...and a boob.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Another teaser exerpt from my forthcoming novel

"If you don't stop fellating me" I replied, "I'm going to tell my wife."

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Its thinking like this that convinced the Australians to fall into lock step with Nazi Germany before world war 2

Tim Blair went off the deep end.

"pacifist hippie types who believe in global warming are in fact the most hawkish of Australian defenders."


Another possible way to stimulate job growth

Just to take the previous post a step further, wouldn't it fix a whole butt load of problems if government were to mandate that small business hire people if they earn profits above an arbitrary threshold?

For instance, its really not unreasonable for a family owned polymer-injection business, or a start-up pinking enterprise to be required to bring on another worker if that business makes more than $20,000 in profits, or they could be required to take on a migrant worker if they pass a $10,000 profit threshold.

This is not a bad idea.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

How To Stimulate Small Business Jobs Growth

As a runner-up to the Milford Regional Chamber of Commerce Businessperson of The Year in 2007 I know a thing or two about business and economics. For instance I know that this purported letter from a conspicuously anonymous, alleged reader of the reactionary conservative rag, the National Review is hogwash:
Small business will start to hire when one big thing happens.
Sales Growth. End of story.

This goes beyond simple intellectual dishonesty and charges head-first to the realm of deliberate misrepresentation.  There is no correlation between small business' hiring practice and sales growth. Only the presence of robust regulation can create an environment conducive to increased employment opportunity in the private sector. By extension, government expansion is a necessity if one wishes to create a job-friendly atmosphere.

That the Chinese blame President Obama for deteriorating relations between our countries draws right thinking people to one inescapable conclusion:

Clearly, the Chinese are assholes.

Fine. I'll come right out and say it in simple English

The BCS needs Orrin Hatch more than Orrin Hatch needs the BCS.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Prince Harry is a ginger kid?


I mean...seriously...did you catch that State of the Union?


That's all there is to say about that.